When I was 16, my world transformed in two profound ways. I became a mother, and I began the journey of raising a child who—like me—experienced the world through a neurodivergent lens. Neither of us knew it then, but we were both autistic, navigating a world that wasn't designed for minds like ours. ## Two Space Cadets Finding Our Way They called me a "space cadet" long before I understood what it meant. Lost in thought, missing social cues, overwhelmed by sensory experiences others barely noticed—I lived in a different orbit from my peers. When my son came along, I recognized familiar patterns in him, though his autism expressed itself differently than mine. He was a bit less on the spectrum than me, but together, we formed our own constellation. What we lacked in traditional guidance, we made up for in understanding. When he couldn't bear the feel of certain fabrics, I didn't need an explanation. When I became overwhelmed in crowded spaces, he instinctively knew...
I know what it’s like to walk into a room, therapy session, or group and feel like everything is built for someone else. For neurodivergent adults, trauma recovery must center our differences—not erase them.
## What Makes Trauma-Informed Care Different
Trauma-informed care recognizes how trauma shapes our nervous systems and view of the world. Instead of asking what’s “wrong with you,” it asks: What happened to you? What do you need right now?
Core values:
- Safety—quiet, flexibility, and sensory-friendly spaces
- Empowerment—honoring your decisions and strengths
- Collaboration—mutual respect and honest feedback
- Trust—consistent support and open communication
- Acceptance—validating neurodivergent needs
## How Trauma Shows Up for Neurodivergent People
Trauma symptoms overlap with neurodivergent traits: trouble with transitions, lingering overwhelm, shutdowns, or needing to stim. Sensory overload, social misunderstanding, and masking are both daily survival skills and wounds.
## Evidence-Based Therapies (and How to Adapt Them)
- **TF-CBT:** Visual aids, breaks, creative/tangible alternatives to “talk”
- **EMDR:** Sensory-friendly options, less verbal
- **Somatic Experiencing:** Movement, stims, honoring bodily cues
- **Narrative Therapy:** Storytelling, art, diagrams
- ** Creative/Expressive:** Music, drawing, poetry, play
Adapt pace, environment, and communication. Make therapy something that works for you, not against you.
## Personalizing Recovery
Set up:
- Low-stimulation, comfortable spaces
- Written or visual communication
- Flexible session structure—always allow pausing or breaks
- Permission for stimming/regulation
- Providers who respect autonomy
## Red Flags
Avoid providers who: dismiss your needs, insist on eye contact, shame stimming, rush your pace, or push “normalcy.” The right fit honors your adaptations and lets you lead.
## In Summary
Recovery for neurodivergent people means healing with our brains and bodies, not against them. You deserve authentic safety, consent, and a path shaped for *you*.
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